Sunday, May 14, 2017

Journal Entry/Blog Post #5: That Day

That Day

          It's been exactly six days after that horrible exam and I still have nightmares about it. To be completely honest, I was pretty confident about this exam. Although I'm a mediocre writer, with barely any skill or talent, I naturally love English and enjoy being in the class. I've learned so much in the past couple of months and I was genuinely happy with my performance in this class as well as the practice tests/essays. Notice the word "was". As pessimistic as it sounds, after this exam, I don't feel as confident in myself or my academic skills anymore. I'm not one to obsess over my grades or get extremely upset if I get a low grade - I'm really not, I'm usually more relaxed - but it's just this one exam that's causing me to feel somewhat uncomfortable. Besides math, English has not only been my best subject, but also my favorite. Going against all my parents hopes and dreams (which wasn't an easy thing to do, I still feel guilty about it), I seriously considered majoring in English in college and potentially pursuing a career in this field. I didn't know exactly what I wanted to do, something along the lines of journalism or comparative literature, but I really wanted to study English in college and somehow find a way to help people by giving them a voice about important issues. To be honest, I don't think I can do that. Yes, I do like this subject. But, if I can't pass an introductory level college exam, how am I ever going to become a professor when I grow up? I'm thinking way too deeply into this, but it's really been crushing my confidence as of lately. 
          This isn't my first time taking an AP exam, as I took the AP Environmental Exam earlier this month on the first, but these two subjects are the first AP classes I've ever taken. My proctor, who was the same person for both of my exams, did a great job reminding us of the time every 10 minutes. That was super helpful, so I'm thankful for that. The process to fill out the bubble sheet was very tedious, but the proctor went through it quickly, so it was okay. I was incredibly nervous in the morning, however, once I got to the school and saw my friends, it was better. I relaxed and calmly went over whatever I could. The passages were not as hard as I thought they were going to be, but that doesn't mean they were easy either. I don't think I did that well on that section and I spent too much time on the first passage. However, I did finish on time and didn't have to rush through any of the questions. This sounds like an exaggeration, but I don't think that I did well on any of the essays. Maybe my synthesis essay was okay, but I think I misread the prompt. I completely bombed the rhetorical essay. I used tone even when my teacher told us not to (out of desperation). And the argumentative essay, my examples weren't exactly great or original. But, hey, at least I didn't rant about Trump like all my friends. Overall, the experience was pretty daunting, but I don't regret taking this class.       

Friday, March 10, 2017

Blog Post # 4: Descriptive Essay


As I stood in the rectangular door frame of my room, which I used to share with my little sister, the first thing I saw was my bed. On top of it was a multitude of different colored pillows paired with a soft, striped blanket and matching bed sheet. A sturdy canopy, made of polished and refined wood towered, over my bed. It was covered, from top to bottom, with an ivory pigmented curtain. The curtain took me back to the time of my sister’s wedding day, as it reminded me of her beautiful, silky wedding dress. At first, I was opposed to anything white in my room, but the memory of how happy my sister looked that day and the warm, milky color of the silk curtain enticed me, so I bought set for my entire house. As they hung prettily in front of my tall windows, the sunlight streams through the small gap, bringing warmth and the hope of a new day. Occasionally, a small gust of wind would take hold of it and cause it to do a beautiful dance, as it flowed smoothly with the wind as its dance partner. Outside one of the windows was a balcony that looked over a large garden teeming with an unimaginable array of gorgeous flowers. The trees, some tall and some short, lined the perfectly cut lawn. In the center of the garden, there was a cute little pond flowered with fresh lily pads and a wooden bridge. The balcony, that projected out of the side of the mahogany colored building, was a concrete ledge, square with rough edges and a rusty rail  - that my parents have been wanting to replace for a long time but never got the chance to - that took me back to the times when I was little when I wasn’t allowed to touch it.

Wednesday, January 4, 2017

Journal Entry/Blog #3: Discrimination in our Society

Discrimination is Still Alive and Well in Our Society
            No matter where we look, whether it’s in the primarily homogeneous society of South Korea, where about 96% of the population is South Korean, or New York, an incredibly diverse place where one classroom itself can consist of students belonging to various ethnicities, we’re bound to see some differences in power, status, wealth, and position in society. Although we have definitely surpassed the time when African Americans were seen as “savages” who were used as slaves and a woman’s sole purpose in life was to be a housewife, showing how we as humans have improved, discrimination is still very evident even today. In our society, certain groups or individuals are treated unfairly, as there is often prejudice directed towards them, leading people to view others as inferior. Discrimination can be based on many things – some being gender identity, race, weight, sexual orientation, or religion – and is easily found anywhere. From the continuous issue of marriage equality to the unfair wage gap between males and females to police brutality directed towards African Americans, discrimination is still very apparent and alive in our society.
            As a nation governed by many founding documents, some of which include the Constitution, the Bill of Rights, and the Articles of Confederation, America is built on a foundation of freedom and liberty. One document in particular is the Declaration of Independence, which was written in a time when America desired their freedom from England. In this document, it states “…all men are created equal” and “…they are endowed with certain unalienable rights, that among these are life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness”, meaning that all humans, regardless of who they are, are granted natural rights by their creator. These documents promise to protect those rights. If this is true, and our nation honored these documents like it says it does, the issue with marriage equality, or rather, marriage inequality, is even more disappointing. Think about it, this document was written, these words were established, more than 200 years ago. So, why did the Supreme Court pass a law allowing same sex marriage in all 50 states of America only a mere two years ago? Why do people still think that they have a right to tell others who they can and cannot marry in the 21st century? Why is it that the American history is filled with a constant struggle for equality and freedom, from the Women’s Suffrage Movement to years of slavery, but people still think it’s justified to ban the marriage of people of the same sex? Understandably, there are many reasons why people are against this idea, with some of the main arguments being that their religion is against it or, since the majority of people are heterosexual, they’re either uncomfortable with it or downright disgusted by it. This is discrimination at its core. Although there are laws that have been enacted to protect them, this prejudice still exists. Many people are kicked out of their homes, attacked, targeted for hate crimes, commit suicide, and are outcast by their peers as a result. So, the main question is: how can we be a country that promises liberty, freedom, and equality for its citizens when we don’t even allow for people to marry whoever they please because they’re of the same gender?
            What does it mean when your teacher asks specifically for the “strong” boys in the class to help her carry the textbooks instead of the girls, even when they volunteer? How would it feel if a girl was asked to stay in the house to take care of her siblings and help her mother with dinner while her brother goes outside to play basketball with his friends? How about the fact that if a girl admitted into the National Honor Society becomes pregnant, she loses her membership and is expelled as a result, but the boy isn’t affected? This right here showcases sexism, or gender discrimination, in real-life examples. Admittedly, sexism isn’t as bad as it was years ago, when girls and boys even took separate classes in school that were deemed “feminine” and “masculine”. However, you can’t say that it’s completely gone. Those examples are just a few of the situations that still occur within our society today. For example, in many Asian societies, specifically India, China, and South Korea among others, there is a very strong preference for male babies, as they are expected to support their families when they grow up. In contrast, a girl would grow up, move to live with her husband’s family, and didn’t usually contribute to supporting her own family. Behind this double standard is an economic factor that goes along with the preference for boys. In many Asian countries, including my own, Bangladesh, sons are expected to live with his parents until their death, with his wife and kids after he gets married, and provide them with financial support. Although times are changing, girls in many of these societies are still considered to be incapable of doing these things. This inequity stems from a greater issue in discrimination, where women were seen as “weak” and “gentle”, thus they had no option but to stay at home, taking care of her children and cooking diner for her husband, whereas a man is seen as “strong” and “capable”, being allowed opportunities to have real jobs and get properly educated.
            One of the biggest problems our society faces today is the issue of police brutality, specifically against African Americans. Police brutality has been an issue for a long time, however, something that has been recently causing controversy is police, mainly white, targeting African Americans solely for their skin color. Yet again, the people within our society proves to be disappointing. Although we’re in the 21st century, and the period in time where slavery and racial segregation were alive is dead and gone, many people still view African American as inferior. Over the years, several stereotypes have also developed in association with black people, which include that black people are dangerous, poor, uneducated, probably have a ton of babies with different lovers, unemployed, and steal things. Because of stereotypes that characterize African Americans as dangerous people who steal things and commit crimes, many people have developed a fear of and are cautious around them, which is absolutely ridiculous. Let’s say for example there are two men, one is a 24 year old white man while the other is an 18 year old black teenager. They both are wearing hoodies, walking along the street, minding their own business. Which one does the police car follow? Of course, he follows the young, black man wearing the hoodie, because he seems suspicious (he’s probably hiding a gun somewhere) and is obviously hiding or trying to get away with something, whereas the white man probably cold or possibly just came from the gym. It sounds crazy to think that someone would actually think this way, but these situations are more real than people think. Take for example, Trayvon Martin or Michael Brown, both unarmed teenagers who were victims of police brutality. This is called racial profiling, which is when people target or suspect a certain person of something because of a stereotype about their race. This type of discrimination is exactly the reason many African Americans, specifically young males, are shot and killed. This injustice against the black community – this misconduct done by people who are supposed to protect us from harm – proves that discrimination is far from over, and that it’s still lingering within our society.
            In any society, discrimination, whether it be aimed at race, ethnicity, gender, sexuality, or social status, is inescapable and is difficult to tackle. No matter how many laws are passed, no matter how many women are successful in jobs usually deemed for men, no matter how many African Americans break the stereotypes imposed upon them, discrimination will always be alive. It’ll never die, because it’s a part of human nature to judge others who are different from us, or what we feel is normal. There will always be people who think they are superior, and there will always be people who use an individual’s "weaknesses" against them. Although people have no right to hurt others by voicing their opinions, they have every right to have an opinion. As long as this is true, racism, sexism, homophobia, and everything in between will continue to exist and discrimination will always be alive in society.